Test results

I knew with a glance

Nervous (upscale)

Fleeting

Yet so lasting the impression (lucky)

That one day I’d be crying into an pillow

Over you (privileged)

With all that we’d build (well heeled)

and produce

(Opulent) Life

These things that we need

to keep

us (Silver spoon)

together

Would push us apart (prosperous)

Funny now that a diagnosis puts us

To that first day that (affluent)

First scared glance from a young girl

(Cancer) back into my heart

 

Corporate lunches

Cause it was on dalton street just around the corner and had dollar burgers and dollar beers on Thursdays at noon

I went in there too

There is Bucky Keyes whose father or uncle or 2nd cousin played a sax in the rolling stones boy he was somebody as he said stupid things and looked confused all day with his expensive camera lenses and loose fitting clothes, bright red hair and forced grin.

There is Pats McGee who played in a band in the 70s drove a carpet walled van full of pot head groupies boy was he somebody with his squeaky clean long grey hair crooked beard line, spaces between all his teeth a man who wished he had authority but only had cliche stories

There is wall eyed Mike who used to play drums in a queer punk rock band the fudge tunnels boy was he somebody with his brown teeth and creepy stubble suspenders and mustard stained tees.

They’re all looking at me, half hour lunch break til a quarter to three

I’m trying to kill a fly as the sweat drips off my beer, the walls are blood red and I don’t hear a sound I know I need to write myself out of these

Boy am I nobody but I don’t buy into their “thank god it’s Friday” kind of freedom

Bleed forever

As I trace the edge

Of the diamond with my teeth

I can’t even _ cut my eyes _ see

The beauty that they sold to me

No longer concerned with simple things

Comfort. Sustenance. The food they bring…..

She brushes her hair and contemplates a pony tail

She likes to be pretty but doesn’t know

What the boys even see

Elk Grove Dairy Queen

When you walk the world

Perfect titles in your mind

never finding pictures that coincide

The only thing I have left of you are the scars you left in mine

Tonight a Polaroid under cicada hums

Flight after flight the planes

People they go and come

We fixed a mess until it was broke

Unfair jury selection

a pelican who birds above our hope

Midwest ice cream Confessions

When you stop the world

Perfect lyrics in your mind

Never finding the music

On the road ever which it hides

The suburbs are where we forgave

The power lines give off the whine

Dumb poets forget how to shave

Remember the women they’ve left behind

While you talked I gathered quarters

We would need to wash the car

All the bugs in the grill

and the blood that is still

And the rhythm of that blues guitar

Swoosh

It is raining so very very hard

Yet the sound of an owl in hills

There are caverns cut in our hearts

Just waiting for the words, to be filled

We can all type out the same chopped lines

Swallow down the same white pills

Corporate logos pay the imaginary bills

A slice of pie from their monthly kills

 

And a lion sings in the stable

Carrying the weight of the lonely

There is no wind to chime but, well only

mother preparing food on the table

 

Another afternoon bleeding out in vain

Father passed away like the sounds of a train

the kicking legs of a dying beast in the plains

 

Visions of this woman’s Solitude

Positioned to be companions

yet fighting for their food

The animal condition of the humans

In this zoo

 

A spider quietly creates her place above the shoed

1980

I had an aunt that taught me the phrase

I’ll show you mine if you…

Back in the formative days

Behind a dumpster she had nice breasts

She smelled of unused tampons and horses breath

My grandfather had 45 confirmed kills

I was chasing ice cream trucks for cheap thrills

She introduced me to her neighbor who taught me how crayfish are caught

While he sat on the riverbank and masturbated into a sock

I heard later that he died of aids

Left behind a wife a daughter

The coming of age

Freedom from the slaughters

And those Normandy raids